I am an out of work writer, which means I am not being paid to write. I am also an out of work actor, as I am not being compensated to act. Having less than efficient skills in either vocation is a generous evaluation, but one must only declare what they are out of work of, as opposed to being able to do it. I have the perfunctory skill to be a writer, which is to write on paper. That no one cares to read my scribbles doesn’t enter the equation. I certainly can act as poorly as the next man, which makes me no less out of work as a thespian.
While I could be out of work in many fields, I choose these noble arts. I haven’t the basic wherewithal to perform a frontal lobotomy and am therefore not an out of work brain surgeon. My finishing the better part of the sixth grade does not allow me to be an out of work professor. It is with mediocre regret, I have no ambition, a lackluster desire to succeed to any degree and only the know how to ramble aimlessly. I have considered the local theater productions, but they have schedules and my propensity for impromptu naps would not allow a regimented day planner. I am further told that writing consists of a discipline of sorts, and a free spirit such as myself could never conform.
Alas, I shall dust off my clubs and become an out of work golfer. It is a crowded field I know, but I think it sits well with writing and acting. I shall tell tales of my golfing prowess, and write and produce a play to further the sharing of my unparalleled accomplishments on the links. People will buy my books and come from near and far to witness my acting. Fame will finally be mine...That is, I will embark on my adventure after my nap. Being an out of work golfer is not for the faint of heart.