If one believes what s/he is told, everything advertised, including via internet, is a must have product.  Home equity loans and bigger abodes are the only way to go. Conversely if one does not fancy mansion living, they must immediately sell and downsize through, ‘Gotta Go Realty.’  Every political or religious conviction aired is the only avenue from having your ass broiled in hell. I have dutifully purchased the ‘must have’, if you can’t afford a good one, Super Deluxe Phone, that provides constant notices and reminders of these and other goods, guaranteed to protect my very being from disintegration.  

 

I employ the services of the internet for the necessities in life:Home team jerseys, tee-shirts, sweatshirts and coffee/beer mugs.  Only the things that separate us from the beasts. Vacations at a “last chance savings,” are dismissed after a cursory review of my checking account.  A razor company of some sort or another, boasts, their revolutionary findings and copious research has resulted in the only blade to be trusted to shave one’s back.  I do not have the requisite mohair effect on my back, to pique my interest. During pre-dawn frollicking, I may have come across a fairer sex candidate, but hadn’t the audacity to inquire nor the courage to turn her over.  I paused at a notice for plus size bras but pushed delete, realizing, should push come to shove, a B mancup would suffice. Home security is apparently all the rage but looking around my living room, I couldn’t help but chuckle.  I was nearly the victim of a robbery years back. The would be thief couldn’t help but tidy up the apartment and leave ten dollars.

 

I do however enjoy ‘free estimates’ on siding, furnaces, landscaping, whatever’s offered.  These companies apparently network effectively and not only fail to come to my house but in some cases have executed cease and desist orders.  The Red Cross not only refuses to grant me an appointment but will not believe the person they once drew blood from under my name, is still alive.  

 

I suppose advertisers will continue to focus on what they can convince us our needs are.  Afterall, creating a need is one of the components of capitalism. I hadn’t realized I might like a vacation, never gave thought to home security and God as my judge, never considered  a bra.